Thursday 15 December 2011

Christmas And Beyond

I've been thinking about Christmas dinner, two years running I had shellfish whilst I looked on longingly at my parents and other half's roast dinners. Last year my mum attempted to cater for me (I had previously refused, as she hates cooking and I didn't want to risk it), which was fine except after I asked as to how the stuffing was made I was told with sausages. Regular, not gluten free sausages. Needless to say I had my first Christmas day glutening.

I'm thinking, I should stick with the seafood rather than the roast, it's too risky. I can't expect my parents to understand gluten free in the way that we do at home, they're elderly and despite me telling them I'm gluten free for so long, it was only a month ago that my dad actually asked what gluten was. Not having a traditional Christmas dinner is starting to sound just fine to me!

That's the thing about the coeliac diet, whenever I'm not at home I'm always worried about eating. Being glutened on any day is horrendous, on a special occasion that I've been looking forward to makes it all the worse. And then there's the getting over being glutened, I'm pretty sure that it was no coincidence that the day after boxing day last year I got a chest infection and flu. It took me until February to get rid of the flu, then my cough was so bad that I got cracked ribs, all in all I didn't get over the whole thing until the beginning of April.

I'm fine with having shellfish for Christmas dinner, I actually prefer it, it's just that missing out on the traditional bit that feels weird. I could of course cook the dinner myself but there's absolutely no room at ours and it would mean having to invade my mum's kitchen. I still recall the reaction when I cooked chestnuts in the oven and they exploded (despite me cutting them first), heaven knows what telling off I'd get if I got the whole kitchen in a mess (which I undoubtedly would).

With thoughts turning to the new year I've started to think about getting married, they're happy thoughts. It's only when I actually think about the logistics of me a coeliac bride that I start to panic. I wish I could wave a magic wand and it all be over and done with and we're married, but despite my alternative views on life, I'm not a fairy and I don't have a wand. I also don't have a fiance who shares my passion for eloping.

It's when I start to think about weddingy things that food becomes the first thing I think about. Food and people kissing me, I've got a huge issue with cross contamination this way. Call it irrational but if you've ever been glutened by any means you'll probably understand. I should point out that I don't mean my future husband, but guests.

And so the thinking about getting married is pushed to the back of my mind again and I focus on work. It's a never ending circle of calm, panic attack, calm, panic attack. Can you imagine being glutened on your wedding day? Being glutened terrifies me in general, thinking of it happening on what is supposed to be the happiest day of my life makes me squirm with horror.

Lots of work to be done, happy place.

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